As I struggle about what to write in honor of this Memorial Day I can’t help but think that most Americans have no understanding of the sacrifice of our service members and their families. I think most of my readers have a better understanding than the general public; however, I don’t even have a full understanding myself. Eighteen flag draped coffins have passed in front of me in the nearly four months I have been here; yet I have not personally known a single one.

Each one of the eighteen have a story, each one a family that’s life has been thrust into utter chaos. I have no baseline to understand the pain that these families feel. I live each day praying I don’t give my family that experience.

I watched the 60 Minutes special this morning (last night over there) about the Iowa National Guard Battalion deployed to Iraq. They were mobilized a full year before me and will be in Iraq through August of this year. That is amazing considering I have already been mobilized almost seven months. It was very interesting to see how their views had changed over the course of their mobilization. Before getting to Iraq they all had grand hopes of making a huge difference in people’s lives and spreading freedom.

War really changes people and changes how they view the world. Like Soldiers in World War II, these Soldiers now do their mission not to make a difference in Iraq, but only to look out for each other. Saving Private Ryan really says it all on this topic, “Ryan, I don’t care about Ryan, that is just a name; but if finding him earns me the right to go back home to my wife, then that is my mission!”

I am going to start a new series of posts answering frequently asked questions. After I answer them; I will make it into a page that combines all the FAQ’s in one post right below the link to “Tools.” This is where you come in; in the comments, tell me what questions new readers need answered to better understand my blog or what questions do you long time readers want answered? The most common question I get is what specifically I have done to pay the debt back.

To understand it better, let me start with the arrangement we had. We leased a 3,500 square foot end cap in a brand new shopping center. Our infill construction cost was approximately $170,000 with $88,000 of that being covered by an infill allowance. We purchased approximately $95,000 of equipment; primarily from two different vendors. To do all of this, we had $30,000 cash and an SBA secured loan for $122,500.

Anyone who has ever obtained an SBA loan is probably familiar with all the ways they attach themselves to you in exchange for their money. First they attach themselves as a second lien on your house. They also require that they have first lien on all equipment and business assets, and they supersede any other agreements in this respect.

When we closed The Lazy Susan, we were only a few days late on our SBA payment; however, with the inevitability of us to not be able to repay the loan and the many other debts, we voluntarily put ourselves in default on the loan at the request of our bank. This may or may not have been our best option; but everything was very difficult at the time. We fought for the ability to sell our own equipment in order to receive more money and avoid some fees; however, the bank denied us that option and auctioned all of our equipment and business assets themselves.

The net result of this auction after all fees were paid was $38,000 toward our SBA loan. Much of the equipment they auctioned off was not paid for; in fact two vendors we owed approximately $40,000 combined; and we no longer had any assets to secure the debt with. This is the point where most people would have filed bankruptcy.

Next we decided to sell our house pro-actively in lieu of having the SBA foreclose on it and auction it. We received permission from the bank to do this, and after several months on the market, successfully sold it. After all the fees were paid there, we netted $103,000 toward our total debt on a house we originally paid $89,500 for. All of the equity went toward the SBA loan. At this point we now had nothing left that someone who was to sue us could attach themselves to. That meant after one year, we were finally in total control of our finances.

Since late December of 2005 we have been actively using the Dave Ramsey system. Part of this is good communication with those we owe money and also doing settlements in full when possible. We have done several of these settlements and have also had three vendors forgive the debt we owed because of our circumstances. These two combined have eliminated about $7,000 of debt we would have owed.

That means of the debt we paid off, $148,000 of it has been paid through three major events that took work to accomplish. The rest has been paid back by working two and three jobs and selling all kinds of small miscellaneous items. God willing, we will be debt free just 48 months after we started on this journey with $556,848.35 of debt!

Amy reminded me that I forgot to mention the cars. Amy’s car that we still owed about $7,000 on was rear ended and totaled last year. We did a good job buying that car, so we had some equity in it; something that is very rare in a car. The insurance company gave us $9,400 for it which we used to pay off the loan and buy our current car for cash. I also sold my truck for what I owed on it last November when I mobilized; that knocked out another $5,000.

Reading this article brings back some old memories. Take a minute to read it here.

When I started my law enforcement career at the Greene County Sheriff’s Department this was the standard way to handle a drunk driver. Actually this is how good officers handled one; some would pretend they weren’t drunk at all and let them drive off; or pretend not to see their traffic violation and not stop them at all.

Before it was even popular, I was on a mission to change this attitude. I knew that if there was one place where an officer could make a real difference that saves lives it was in the area of DWI enforcement. So much of law enforcement is reactive with little or no chance of prevention by the police; they can only come in after and solve the crime.

When you arrest someone for DWI and require them to sit in jail for five hours, it makes the above scenario impossible. It sends the message that there is no tolerance. It makes people see the seriousness of their actions. So why would an officer not make an arrest? Really there are only two reasons.

First and most likely is laziness. It takes an hour to an hour and a half to investigate and process a DWI arrest. Then it will take another hour to hour and a half to write the report. Add on the almost certain court appearance with a tough cross examination, and many officers feel it is not worth the hassle. Supervisors who don’t like calls backing up while the officer is processing the drunk only add to this cycle of death. It takes real work and real commitment; it is not for the lazy.

The second reason is the officer condones the activity because they too participate in it. While this is not the common reason, it still occurs. A few years ago I wrote a piece about DWI enforcement that was published in a National law enforcement magazine. If you have a few minutes, read it below.

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Recently I was able to spend 17 wonderful days back home on R&R from my tour in Afghanistan. These were some incredible days for me. The Army does a great job with their R&R system. We get 15 midnight to midnight days at home, and when you add in the travel day at the front and back end, you have a wonderful vacation.

Unlike a lot of people who have extravagant vacation plans for their R&R; I went home and hung out with my family and friends. That is all the extravagance I need. We went to a couple of Springfield Cardinals games, and went to the Kansas City Royals on a Military Monday. The best part was being able to take Jeremiah to school every day and pick him up after school and go for treats with him and Sarah. I think I spoiled them a little too much; hopefully they have recovered.

Leaving was hard, but not as hard as Christmas or February. This time I was going into a known situation where the other two times everything was unknown. The pain of separation is still bitter, and really feels harsh today. I ache to be back home with my family, but that will have to wait for now.

Fifteen years ago today I began my Army career as a reserve enlisted Soldier. This fifteen year anniversary is one I wasn’t sure I was going to make it to; but one that is extremely important.

Three years ago the Army was very actively trying to throw me out. Because of the injuries to my leg, the Army had classified me as a P3; a permanent injury to my leg that was a level 3 of 4 levels based on my physical capabilities. In order to be deployable and to stay in the military you must have this at a level 2 or below or receive a waiver from a General Officer (officer of the rank of a Brigadier General or higher).

In order to obtain this waiver I appeared in person in front of a board of five Colonels, one of which was a surgeon. I literally pleaded my case to be able to remain in the Army, and four of the five were sympathetic; however, the surgeon was only concerned with the gravity of my injuries. In the end the board recommended a waiver and the Commanding General concurred.

The significance of fifteen years is the Army Reserve can medically discharge a Soldier up to their fifteenth anniversary and owe them nothing in the form of retirement; however, once you reach your fifteenth anniversary, if you are medically discharged you lock in your retirement. I have no plans of taking advantage of this; however, as many times as they have tried to medically remove me, I can now have peace of mind.